Wednesday Wheel of Blog

 

Spin, Spin, Spin, the Wheel of Blog...where it stops nobody knows!

This week, the wheel landed on...Advice from Big Sister!

I have had the pleasure of being a Big Sister. First, I was a Big Sister in the Big Brothers, Big Sisters program. I loved working once a week with my Little Brother at the local elementary school. Then, at age 15 years and 3 days, I became a big sister when my little brother was born.

Me and brothers, huh?

Over the years, I have tried to pass down knowledge to my little brother based on my trial and errors. I take some of that advice now and share it with you.

It’s no fun being normal.

I have always classified myself as a geek or nerd. I enjoyed video games and watching anime, I wore glasses, all the earmarks of the stereotypical geek. I progressed as an adult and even started cosplaying as some of my favorite characters. My brother sometimes can get held up by that “I don’t want to be different/I want to be normal” mentality. My best advice: Don’t settle for normal. It’s not fun being normal. Be unique. Be yourself. 

Sometimes, the best course of action is to kill them with kindness.

There’s going to be confrontation in your life. It’s unavoidable. You can’t control what happens around you, but you can take control of yourself. I’ve had situations where I am beyond mad. I’ve been read to flip a desk or swear like a sailor. That course of action is best to avoid as it may lead to being hung up on or escorted out of the building.

Instead, I suggest you take the action I’ve adopted over the years. Kill them with kindness. What does that look like exactly?

First, set all the anger and hostility to the side. The other person probably isn’t much happier and making them even worse with your bad temper won’t help anything.

Second, politely yet firmly repeat your message. Use the same firmness when repeating back what you are hearing from the other person. You want to be clear you are understanding them correctly. This comes in handy when setting up services at home that can only be ordered over the phone and this is the first person you’ve been transferred to. 

Third, use good manners. Say please and thank you. 

You can be assertive and still have nice manners. Just imagine the person you’re speaking to complaining about you later.

Manager: Did they yell at you?

Employee: No.

Manager: Swear?

Employee: No.

Manager: *confused* Then what’s the issue?

Employee: They were…nice! Like really nice!

Exercise a little patience.

Little brother is already a patient waiter on people (except for when lunch is late), but I still give him this advice. It’s needed now more than ever. 

Don’t yell at the one gas station clerk checking people out. They can’t control who calls out of work. Don’t get mad at the sub shop worker because they discontinued carrying Swiss cheese. That’s a few pay grades higher than them. 

It seems like everyone is short handed these days, but I feel like there are a lot less short tempers hanging around. A little patience and kindness goes a long way to turning a person’s day from bad to good.